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What do Jenny McCarthy and the Taliban have in common?
You know when you think you have a great idea because nobody’s doing it, and you find out it’s because the Nazis did it, giving you that oogie feeling Indiana Jones got after discovering his...
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Mars Attacked!
It is with joyful elation that we bring you this news from the recently opened front in the War on Aliens: Mars! The Curiosity rover has just vaporized the first rock in what will prove to be the...
View ArticleCongratulations! You get to name what kills off humanity
In Deep Impact it was called Wolf-Biederman. In Seeking a Friend for the End of the World it was called Matilda. In Armageddon it didn’t have a name. Now NASA agrees that if an asteroid is going to...
View ArticleMt. Fuji to erupt, possibly throw salt in the eyes of Bret Hart
Oh, whoops, we got our T’s and R’s confused. Well, nonetheless, the mountain named Gregor Clegane Fuji is close to erupting. So, those planning on traveling to Japan, you might want to speed up those...
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Smoking grass endangers humanity
Cheatgrass, seen here trying to light this human’s shoelaces on fire. With all the wars that the Guys wage, we’re wary to start another one, especially one with plants. We don’t know if you’ve noticed,...
View ArticleHow to dispose of a Tony Romo jersey
The Dallas Cowboys had a pretty bad season. It wasn’t terrible, but it wasn’t what Dallas fans were hoping for. The season was capped by a loss to the rival Washington Redskins, a game in which...
View ArticleWe didn’t create drones to not blow things up
In this war we’re fighting, we need to use every tactical advantage we can against our enemy, and that includes employing the latest war technology. That, of course, means using our drones. A logical...
View ArticleIt’s not a celebration until you level your house
Ever wonder what people do when they win the lottery? Turns out they do exactly what you think they will — plus blow up their house. In Kansas, two brothers won $75,000 from the lottery and decided to...
View ArticleFlorida continues to up the wackiness, this time with space
You may have heard about the meteor shower that happened over Russia recently. A lot of attention was brought to the area thanks to the damage it created just on the offhand. Florida, being the...
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Allies play ‘long game’ strategy in Germany
The most productive factory workers were able to lay hundreds of these “democracy eggs” a day. Back in the 1940s, the world wasn’t sure if German people would ever get back to wearing shorts with...
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